Updated: Aug 20, 2021
Relationships are a difficult thing with ups and downs, highs and lows. It takes work, commitment, and a willingness to adapt with your partner to have a truly fulfilling relationship. However, sometimes it is just not meant to be. People break up or get rejected and it feels hurtful like the world is ending, but eventually, we all bounce back from these moments.
Recently, I had the opportunity to interview people who have witnessed this first hand. They shared their experiences and looked back on their past relationships with the hope that someone may be able to relate to them or learn something from it all.
The first person we interviewed was Rafly from Grade 11 who has been in a relationship for about a year. When asked what he wanted from a relationship he said he wanted someone he could be in sync with. Someone who shared his interests like video games. Who was parallel with him. To him, taking things slow and building a relationship with a foundation of trust was the most important.
Then we had Person B, coming from another country he had trouble maintaining a long-distance relationship with a past girlfriend back at home. It didn’t last long after he moved and he explained that maintaining a close relationship from so far away was the biggest challenge. But regardless of the past he still looks to the future with gleaming optimism in hopes of finding a partner who is “everlasting”. Looking back on his previous relationship, he said the fondest memories were the domestic ones. Just going out to the movies and other “normal” activities were made better when they were doing it together.
And last but not least Person C, an anonymous high school senior, said that what she wanted in a relationship was three basic things: humor, caring, honesty. Their relationship lasted a little over a year, and to her, the hardest part was communication. She could hardly get through with her partner who she describes as always wanting to be right and not caring about her feelings. Though it wasn’t all bad, she recalls hanging out at school along the corridors together, and despite having strict parents, going on the occasional date. Her advice for others? To be patient and to wait for the right person.
Something common amongst all our responses was the way they all approached their relationships. Slowly, taking their time. In my opinion, this is a good way to take things as people like me who rushed into a relationship just ended up crashing in failure. It all happened because I didn’t get to know her beforehand and when we got further into it, we realized that we just weren’t compatible.
So what’s our advice? Take things easy, relationships are something to enjoy and there shouldn’t be any pressure getting into one. Sure it’s a beautiful thing when you finally meet that special person, but things will be fine even if that doesn’t happen. Don’t feel that just because everyone else is doing it that I need to, that’s not how love works. Communicate with your partner, be mature about it and have fun.